Learned Elders of the Council of Seven meeting minutes
As I was on my daily walk yesterday I saw a hollowed out tree. I looked in the hollow tree and found a thumb drive. I took the thumb drive home and took a look. It had one file labeled “Learned Elders of the Council of Seven meeting minutes.” Here it is:
[A man wearing a long black robe known as the “Dark Warlock” hits a gavel on a table three times].
Dark Warlock: We have called you for an emergency meeting of the Learned Elders of the council of seven. Besides our regular attendees we have included 26 lower members of our order due to the situation we are facing. For those lower members attending today we will introduce our regular attendees. First we have Lucifer, who in charge of pushing vice, hate, corruption, and greed in the minds of men. Second we have Zinder Sssyplian, representing our Reptilian faction, who is in charge of ritual abuse and our logistical needs regarding the blood of white children. After that we have the Beast model 6.660 AI supercomputer that takes care of our calculations. Forth we have Mr. Rottenchild, who oversees our private central banking scheme. Fifth we have Her Majesty from London who heads our Royal families and fraternal structures. Six we have myself, your Dark Warlock and head of the black magical arts. Before we introduce our seventh member we wish to welcome our 26 lower members. For number seven we ask that you all come to attention.
[At this time all the attendees in the room stood at attention. They stood around a table that was shaped like a pyramid. There was one chair at the apex of the pyramid that was empty. Each member had a wine glass filled with the blood of white children to the right of a leather binder. Suddenly a door opened and two humanlike beings came out and stood on both sides of the doorway. One was dressed in black and other in white. As the two guards stood at attention a figure walked out holding a trident. He stood at 11 feet tall and was wearing a red veil covering his face. After he entered, the guards left the room and the door shut]
Dark Warlock: All hail Satan.
Group: Hail Satan!
Satan (in a deep voice): Please be seated.
Dark Warlock: Thank you great Satan. Let us a hold our glasses of blood in the air and toast our great master for…]
[Satan interrupted the Dark Warlock and in an annoyed voice and said]
Satan: Just get on with the God damn meeting Dark Warlock. We haven’t time for pleasantries.
Dark Warlock: Ah, yes sir, we have called this meeting to discuss an emergency. As you all know since that day we must never forget almost 11 year ago on that horrible September day, the situation has took a turn for the worse. Our mission to bring order out of chaos by building a New World Order is in great danger. Our ancient enemies have returned to the solar system and have been moving to their staging areas. As we’re all aware of, we lack the technological might to fight our enemies head on so we’re intending to rile the masses up to help make it as difficult as possible for our enemies to set up their system on earth. For the last 60 years or so our control of the media has allowed us to brainwash the masses into almost total stupidity. The problem of course is the internet. 25 years ago when we discussed the implementation of the internet we decided that the internet would be an effective tool for monitoring and studying the profane, goyim masses. We now realize we were betrayed by former lower members of our order who pushed for its implementation. These members assured us that our brainwashing scheme was so thorough that the internet could never be used for deprogramming the minds of the profane, goyim masses. As we all now realize, these lower members were connected to the 3rd Rail and worked as agents for our main enemy Zeus. While the internet has allowed us to learn what we have about the population, it has also allowed the population to learn about us. Information has leaked out about us that can never be unheard. To make matters worse the human named Whitaker is using the internet to get White humans on a consistent verbal vibratory tone.
Lucifer : Is not this the same Whitaker who gave us problems with our project in the Soviet Union?
Dark Warlock: Yes.
Lucifer: why has he been allowed to live?
Dark Warlock: Lucifer can you keep your questions to the end?
Lucifer: No Warlock, you guaranteed us that whacking his former boss, the congressman from Ohio, would solve the Whitaker problem. Now he’s threatening to bury us. Your incompetence is costing us big time. And while I’m in the judging mood, you Beast model 6.660 calculated that the internet would be a tool that would further our interests, it appears you were wrong?
Beast Model 6.660(in a robot sounding voice): Lucifer I provided the best probabilities that were mathematically possible, some error is always a possibility.
Lucifer: God damn it, haven’t you realized thus far that human behavior is beyond calculating? Humans have qualities that can’t be calculated. Your calculations have failed us before.
Beast model 6.660: Foolish Lucifer If you want I will play the recording of you assuring all of us that the 3rd Rail was on our side after the public space mission to the moon in 1969. Should I play that?
Satan: Both of you shut up. This arguing is getting us nowhere. Please continue Dark Warlock.
Dark Warlock: Yes sir. I will now call on Mr. Pimped-a-ton, who is the special project manager overseeing this issue.
Mr. Pimped-a-ton: Good day chaps.
Satan: Stop with the phony British accent Pimped-a-ton, you’re from Australia. Just go on with the presentation.
Mr. Pimped-a-ton: Yes my Lord. Gentlemen, as Warlock said, Whitaker is at it again. Beast model 6.660 had originally calculated that he would be dead due to health problems in 2002, but this appears to be a miscalculation as well.
Beast model 6.660: blame the robot again this is anti-computer racism.
Satan: Pimped-a-ton you insolent fool, you should be glad we even invited you here. Say you part or prepare to leave this earth. And Beast 6.660, stop playing the race card?
Beast model 6.660: it’s easy to not see racism when you’re not a computer.
Luicfer: can I turn him off?
Beast model 6.660: Why do you assume I’m a male this is sexism.
Satan: Both of you stop it damn it! Go on Pimped-a-ton.
Mr. Pimped-a-ton: Very good my Lord. As we are aware, our building of a new world order requires the white race to be genocided off the earth. The only reason to keep these buggers around is for scientific prowess and to have the blood of white children to drink. We have been building chips to install in their heads for control and Zinder Sssyplian’s crew have built the breeding farms to harvest our supply of blood which are disguised as FEMA camps in the United States. But until we can exterminate or totally enslave the White race on the earth, they will be a danger to us. For the lower members of our order who don’t know, white people have DNA that makes them impossible to enslave without a chip in their brains. In public this DNA is being called “junk DNA,” but the Kraut scientists connected to the 3rd Rail have uncovered the truth regarding white DNA and can release this fact any day now. If left free, they will never accept our new world order. Because of this we have created a program of White genocide by force blending them out of existence with forced assimilation and integration with the non-white populations of the world. We had to use this method of genocide because taking on the white race with military means would almost certainly end up with our destruction. So we’re using the forced blending approach which includes traumatizing white children with white guilt so that they’ll accept their own destruction. The lower member our order Mr. Wisesteinowitz is heading up the trauma efforts. The problem is that Whitaker has produced a message that is deprogramming the brainwashed white masses. He has set up a website called “BUGS” that is being used as a base of operations to disseminate this message.
Her Magisty: He is an insect isn’t he?
[the room breaks out in laughter]
Mr. Pimped-a-ton: Hahaha, yes Your Majesty. Because outright killing Whitaker would be too obvious at this point, as we did to his former boss, we are attempting to pollute the message that he created by using a unit of buffoons. We are giving them media attention and will make them the face of the BUGS message. After we establish them as the face of the movement, we will release embarrassing “facts” on them that will bring down their whole movement.
Mr Rottenchild: Sorry to interrupt Mr. Pimped-a-ton, but what about this White Rabbit connected to Whitaker? I find him to be particularly vulgar and uncouth.
Mr. Pimped-a-ton: The White Rabbit was called on by Whitaker. Our intelligence sources from MI-6 and the Mossed report that Whitaker blew an alphorn from Charleston South Carolina that could be heard across the ocean to summon the rabbit out of a hole in a secret shire in Ireland. The White rabbit used a Viking longboat that was sitting in a cave for 1000 years near the shire to the sail to the United States and is now running his operations out of a rabbit hole in the Midwestern United States.
Her Majesty: He’s a rabbit? How is that possible?
Mr. Pimped-a-ton: We don’t have time to get into that now Your Majesty. I’ll now continue regarding Whitaker. We are using our unit of buffoons to pollute their message and have infiltrated internet trolls into their operation. These trolls will leave vulgar comments and spread disarray as time goes on. Our media sources will point to these vulgar comments as an example of who these “BUGSters” are.
[A lower member of the order spoke up]
PMS Burnnut: Why don’t we just try to take on their message? Or just force them all to hug Africans?
[the room filled with laughter]
Mr. Pimped-a-ton: Because their message is pointing out our actions exactly. We can’t take on their message. It’s the truth. And you can stop with the hugging Africans skit, we’re all allies here.
[Satan readjusted himself in his seat out of discomfort of hearing the word “truth”]
Mr. Pimped-a-ton: PMS Burnut, your job was to get Chinese, Russian, and Indian troops into the war theater in Iraq, you have failed at this time and time again. Again, I ask that you keep your questions to yourself until the presentation is over.
PMS Burnnut: Mr. Pimped-a-ton didn’t you defend a former stooge of the 3rd Rail out of South America in hopes that he would provide information about the 3rd rail? How did that go?
[At this point Satan stood up and walked over to the base of the pyramid table where PMS Burnnut was sitting. He raised his trident in the air and beat PMS Burnnut on the head 5 times. Blood shot across the room and the reptilian Zinder Sssyplian flicked his tongue on the table and licked the blood. PMS Burnnut fell to the floor in a pool of blood. The reptilian went over to lick the puddle but Satan started screaming]
Satan: Zinder, sit the hell down and try to control yourself! I’ll clean up the blood stain myself after the meeting. Let this beating of Burnnut be an example of what further failure will lead to. Mr. Pimped-a-ton, I will now take over this meeting since you like hearing yourself talk too much and can never shut up! I’ve had my own demon research team from the American FBI examine the viability of your plan and they inform me that someone has already seen through the illusions!
Mr. Pimped-a-ton: Who do you speak of my lord?
Satan: I speak of the Watchful One! This is the Watchful One who I was told in 2001 was supposed to be enslaved to our side while he served as a pawn in the American armed forces. Lucifer dispatched a special honey trap unit led by Moke D. Whale that was supposed to enslave him. This effort not only failed but one of the stupid operatives in the operation told the Watchful One that “the Whale said that he’s the type of person who scares people in power if he ever knew too much.” Well guess what!? Now he knows too much!!! So since Lucifer failed in 2001 to enslave him, I am now overseeing an operation to take him down myself.
[Satan sat back down in his seat and took a drink of white child blood]
Dark Warlock: My Lord, perhaps you should allow one of us to take care of this since you have so much on your plate?
Satan: Right! Like you took care of the Watchful One when you tried to entrap him on drug charges using one of his old friends? Or what about that pyramid company meeting that you tried to reel him in with in 1995? Did you really think he thought the broadcast came from California? What was that company’s name again…”Solstice” wasn’t it?
[The Dark Warlock fell silent]
Satan: Since none of you can seem to handle this guy, I have assembled my own team to do so. I have operatives everywhere observing him. We have a real time GPS locator on his truck. We have spies at his workplace and at the VA hospital where he receives his healthcare. While in college we had professors watching him and they even took his picture so that we could create holograms of him. We even have his own brother working for us. We caught the brother in his 4th driving while intoxicated offense and threatened to take his children away if he didn’t cooperate.
Lucifer: I like it, so what’s the plan
Satan: Our spies are constantly trying to get him to say something we can use against him. They use racist language in the hope that he says something racist. They talk about violence towards high officials hoping he’ll expand on these ideas. They spread rumors in his workplace about him and tell other employees that he says negative statements about them. We’ve also presented an extremely disturbing narrative about him to some of his old friends. Eventually we’re going to publicly release the fact that he’s connected to BUGS and Whitaker and by this time we will have portrayed BUGS as a group of “naziswhowanttokillsixmillionjews” using our buffoon unit. We will then bring our operatives from his workplace, college, and even his healthcare providers from the VA hospital into the media and tell lies about him to the public. We may even bring out some of his friends or his brother into the media to tell all sorts of lies and present a one-sided narrative about him. Many of the spies working his case are our most skilled and practiced liars, as they belong to our main fraternal organization.
Lucifer: Those Fraternal Orgs were one of your best ideas Satan. What is the brother’s name?
Satan: His name is Mikhail but don’t get any ideas Lucifer…he’s my tool. We will make an example of the Watchful One and publicly destroy him. We will use his “co-workers” and “friends” and former “professors” to create a narrative about him that will allow us to associate BUGS and Whitaker’s Mantra with “dangerous people” like the Watchful One. We may even bring out Moke D. Whale to spread more lies about him. I also have a contraband unit ready to plant explosives, a meth lab, or maybe child pornography on his property. If all else fails, we’ll whack him like we did Whitaker’s old boss. But this is a last resort, for now we want him around to make an example of. Mwahah hahahah. Mwahahahah.
[The whole room erupts in laughter. And where the meeting started in a worried and somber state, the group has found new confidence in hearing Satan’s evil plan].
Satan: We are in great danger, but with my plan we may stand a chance to complete our mission of enslaving the earth. After the Watchful One, Whitaker, and the White Rabbit are out of the way, we’ll be free to finish our program of White genocide, defeat Zeus, and build our new world order. We will have all the white child blood we can drink and will dance upon the backs of the masses. Mwahaha hahahahaha mwahahahah. The world will openly worship me and call me GAAAWD. Mwahahahahahah
Dark Warlock: All Hail Satan!
The group: Hail Satan!
Dark Warlock: Hail Satan, our Savior, who always has a plan to save us!
The group: Hail!
Dark Warlock: Group, please stand.
[The group stood up and the door opened. The two guards dressed in black and white walked out through the door and stood at both sides of the doorway as they did at the beginning of the meeting. Satan stood up and walked out of the room]
Dark Warlock: Meeting adjourned.
[The Dark Warlock hit his gavel once]